Bristow guru grandma pens a book

Bristow author Carol Covin doesn't look like "Granny Guru." Yet that is her nom de plume in print and online.

The woman wearing stylish boots, a long western skirt and a white cowgirl hat, and sporting a thick, dark braid and a smile, recently stood behind her table at the Nokesville Farmers Market and laughed.

"My friend said I look too young to be called Grandma," she said. "She said I need to be called 'Glam-Ma.' "

In spite of her real-life appearance, Covin has further developed the Guru persona in her latest book, "Who Gets to Name Grandma? The Wisdom of Mothers and Grandmothers."

Covin held a book signing at the market in June. The venue, which offers farm fresh produce, crafts and homemade items, seemed to perfectly match her mien and her down-home book of thought.

Based on 40 interviews, half with mothers, half with grandmothers, Covin's collection of essays shares in-sights on raising children and interacting with grandchildren.

She uses her own experiences as a mother and grandmother to augment ideas from other motherhood pros, some-times offering an opposing view.

"I am the perfect grandmother," one grandmother says in the book. "I don't say anything to my daughter about how to raise her children."

But Granny Guru contends, "Grandmothers may be right, but you'll never know unless you let them offer you advice."

Covin also relays motherly frustrations in pieces that declare, "Ice cream is not a meal!" and "Your son is not perfect!"

Grandmothers get to communicate those oft-hidden sentiments such as, "I am not your babysitter," "I really don't feel I have the right to discipline [the grandchildren]" and "My grandchil-dren seem so ungrateful."

At the heart of the book is, of course, the question of who gets to name grandma.

The volume explores how children and grandchildren decide what to call which grandparent. Sometimes, it's the tradition that dictates a name. Other times, it's the will of the parent.

"It's interesting how grandchildren and children choose names," Covin said.

Nokesville resident Roberta Messamer visited Covin's table and described the origins of her own familial titles.

Her grandchildren call her "Grandmother" because her husband's mother was known as that.

But, her great-grandchildren call her "Grandma Roberta," making little distinction between the genera-tional gaps of grandmother and great-grandmother.

"There's a power play between children who have the first and second grandchildren," Covin said.

Covin offers readers a treasure chest of wisdom and intergenerational insight.

What made her perceptive enough to pick up on this theme?

Perhaps it is as one grandmother says in the book: "It's amazing how smart we get when we become grandmothers."

"Who Gets to Name Grandma? The Wisdom of Mothers and Grandmothers" is available from Twenty Minutes Press. For more, see granny-guru.com.