Racing piglets make hilarious return to Prince William Fair

Prince William County, Va. - Swifty the Swimming Pig apparently thought the cheer "Go, Swifty, Go" was a cue for him to do something more than paddle his way through an eight-foot water-filled container.

As announcer Jonas Mitchell was revving up the crowd packed into the wooden bleachers on Saturday afternoon, Swifty was answering nature's call.

Finally, after much prodding and a lot of laughter from both Mitchell and the crowd, Swifty leaped into the water and in a few short strides, cleared the length of the container.

Swifty's actions were just some of the fun to be had at the Prince William County Fair Kids' Zone.

There were three rounds of pig races and all of the entries had comical nicknames. David Hassellhog, Spamela Anderson and Arnold Schwarzenhogger took first prize, consisting of an Oreo cookie on a silver-colored plate.

The entertaining Mitchell also got the crowd into it with his colorful descriptions of the pigs. Each race was hyped up with the bugle call made famous before every horse race at Churchill Downs.

And every pig had a hand-picked "cheerleader." The winning "cheerleader" got a free pig key chain and his own cookie.

While he didn't win with Brad Pig in heat two, "cheerleader" and Manassas Park resi-dent Jaymes Ross, 5, got a kick out of the competition. Adorned with a plastic pig snout, the wavy-haired Ross said his favorite part of the show was when the pigs "popped out" of the chute.

Mitchell's cousin Zach Johnson started the Swifty Swine Racing Pigs act a few years ago. A New Mexico native and Kansas City resident, Mitchell now takes his wife and his two young sons on the road each weekend for a new gig.

They have two acts that travel everywhere from San Diego to Wisconsin.

This year was their first trip to Prince William County.

Along with the races, folks checked out Brutus the Baconator, a 1,200-pound behemoth of a hog that is reportedly "10,000 pork chops from snout to tail." Jaymes' father, James Ross, was quite impressed with Brutus, who raked in quarter after quarter from interested fairgoers just by laying on the ground.

"He [Jaymes] loved it," Ross said. "Nobody in our family had seen something that size. It was quite impressive."

Mitchell claimed that Brutus, whom he's ridden before, is the largest pig in the world. He may be now.

A 1,600-pound pig in upstate New York died in 2008. His name was "Big Norm." Apparently "Big Norm" died of a massive heart attack, according to the The Post-Standard.

Swifty Swines Racing Pigs hit the starting gate five times Sunday and Saturday. During the week, they can be seen four times daily, starting at 4 p.m.

Staff writer Kipp Hanley can be reached at 703-530-3904.