Give a boy a dog, Manassas

Every boy could use a dog, but Jayden White really needs one.

Jayden, 5½, was born with fetal alcohol syndrome and needs a well-trained canine companion to help him in many ways, said his adoptive mother, Kerry White.

White and her family are raising money to get a service dog from 4 Paws for Ability, a nonprofit organization that trains dogs to help people with special needs.

Jayden, who currently has the cognitive ability of a 2- to 3-year-old, is easily distressed.

Sometimes he gets so upset that he holds his breath until he passes out.

If that happened with a trained dog around, the dog would be there to break his fall and watch over him until he recovers, White said.

“Hopefully, it’ll be a comfort enough beforehand, and he won’t get to that point,” said the 42-year-old White, who, along with her husband, John, and daughters Morgan and Whitney, took Jayden into their family when he was 9 months old.

Jayden came to the Whites after Kerry White saw an article about children with fetal alcohol syndrome who needed foster families.

She checked into it and found Jayden, who suffered from neglect and who showed a failure to thrive in his birth home.

The Whites began fostering Jayden, who is crazy about the cartoon show “Scooby-Doo.” 

“He came to us, and it became pretty obvious early on that he was very medically fragile. The one thing Jayden needed more than anything in his life when he came to us was a mom that could take care of him and keep him safe and help him overcome all of his medical challenges,” Kerry White said of her adopted child, who can communicate with limited sign language.

“The person who should have done that failed him over and over again and thankfully he survived that situation and was never returned to it.”

Jayden also has trouble sleeping at night because he has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.

White said having the dog in bed with him might help Jayden get more rest.

A dog also could assist if Jayden goes missing.

White said Jayden is prone to run off if is family members turn their backs on him, even just for a second. And he’s fast for a youngster of only 30 pounds.

“If he gets lost, the dog will be trained to find him way faster than people could find him,” said White, a part-time medical technologist with the federal government.

It costs about $20,000 to train a dog to help a child with autism or fetal alcohol syndrome, and 4 Paws for Ability asks that people who are seeking service dogs help pay for the pooch’s training.

The Whites set a goal of $13,000 to give to the organization even though they could get the dog at no charge if they couldn’t pay.

“In reality, nothing is free,” Kerry White said. “Those dogs have to be trained, and somebody is trained to train those dogs.”

A recent $1,500 donation from Northern Virginia Electric Cooperative brought the Whites’ total to roughly $9,000.

Brentsville District High School, where Whitney is a senior, allows the Whites to sell T-shirts at sporting events to raise money.

Victory Elementary School, where Jayden attends class, is holding a cheesecake sale to help the family with expenses.

And the Baja Bistro at Bristow Center is allowing the Whites to sell wristbands and chocolate roses.

“They have been very supportive, and their customers have been very generous,” said Kerry White, whose husband is a program manager for SAIC. 

White’s daughters were 13 and 15 years old and becoming independent by the time the family started fostering Jayden in 2006.

As the years passed and it became clear that things were not going to get better at Jayden’s birth home, the Whites decided to adopt him.

“I had my girls young, and they kind of didn’t need me anymore, and I still had a lot of mom left in me,” Kerry White said.

“It was a long process, but we never doubted our decision, and we also went in with our eyes wide open, knowing full well he would likely need care all of his life,” she said.

Indeed, raising Jayden has “changed the direction” of the family’s future.

“Now we focus on improving his quality of life and helping him be the best he can be, whatever that may be,” White said.

Morgan White, now 20, helps with Jayden’s care. Her family was able to hire her  to care for Jayden with a Medicaid waiver since she no longer lives at home.

She is responsible for feeding and bathing Jayden, for getting him on and off the school bus, and for making sure he gets his medication. 

“The whole reason I took the job is because I don’t live here anymore, and I was always afraid that  I wasn’t going to be a part of his life,” said White, a student at Northern Virginia Community College. “I was afraid he wasn’t going to have that brother-sister connection with me.”

And as for a boy-dog connection, Kerry White said Jayden deserves the companionship.

“Every child should absolutely have a dog. His just needs special training,” she said.

Donations for Jayden to get a dog may be made to www.4pawsforability.org, or to giveaboyadog.yolasite.com.

Senior reporter Keith Walker can be reached at 703-369-6751.